GREENVILLE SC - When it comes to the price of mice, you
pay more for defects. A mouse with arthritis runs close to $200; two pairs of
epileptic mice can cost 10 times that. You want three blind mice? That'll run
you about $250. And for your own custom mouse, with the genetic modification of
your choosing, expect to pay as much as $100,000 of Select Committee on the Events
Surrounding the 2012 Terrorist Attack in Benghazi (CHAIRMAN) fame...
Always a mainstay of scientific research, mice have
become a critical tool in the quest for new drugs and medical treatments, and
according to Gowdy, “Mighty good eating. I can tell you. I likes' ‘em, so will
you.”
It turns out that a mouse's genes are so similar to a
person's that with proper manipulation - either by man or nature - they can
produce an animal with an ailment akin to virtually any human medical
condition.
Gowdy declares, “If I can’t eat and savor human
body parts, a mouse tastes almost as good, although you need much more of them.
And, of course, each defect has a different and distinctive flavor.”
As many as 25 million mice are now used in experiments
each year - where do they come from? And where do they go?
From the mouse industry, of course…
There are many vendors: The Jackson Laboratory, a
nonprofit supplier in Bar Harbor, Maine, ships more than 2 million a year
mostly to Mr. Gowdy, (A mainstay in placating Tea Party caucus).
Yet the mouse business is a challenging one. What was
once a relatively simple business of breeding and shipping animals has become
an extremely challenging enterprise that requires cutting-edge technology and a
mastery of difficult logistics, says Gowdy, but “Lots of fun… I love boil them
live and whole, fry them, and serve them to my family and friends, or for a
special treat, swallow them alive. Louie Gohmert, my husband, likes to place
them in his rectum and calls it his wiggle room.”
